Beating Premature Ejaculation

I usually do not recommend that you use premature ejaculation condoms (also known as delay condoms or climax control condoms), but I do believe that you should make your own choices based on solid information, so on this page you’ll find all the info that matters to you about PE condoms.

What are premature ejaculation condoms?

They are basically condoms which are especially manufactured for men who ejaculate prematurely.

How do they help to prevent PE?

There are different ways how these condoms help to delay ejaculation. Some condoms are simply just thicker, thus reducing the friction and other sensations you have when you have intercourse. Other condoms actually contain a chemical which temporarily makes the skin of your penis a bit numb.

What chemicals are used to numb the penis?

They often contain benzocaine on the inside of the condom. This is a local anesthetic that is often used to relieve pain. There are possible side effects when using benzocaine on your skin, among them allergic reactions (itching, hives, swelling, tingling sensations, headache, etc.). In rare cases benzocaine can also cause methemoglobinemia, which is a serious blood disease.

Is the numbing effect immediate?

Now when the numbing of sensations is simply caused by a kind of thicker rubber, then yes, of course. But if benzocaine is used to reduce sensations, then it usually takes 1-2 minutes until the numbing effect really sets in after putting on the condom.

Can I just use two condoms on top of each other?

You surely can do that, but I advise you against doing that. One issue is that when you wear two condoms on top of each other, it creates additional friction (rubber with rubber) which can cause your condoms to tear or break.

There’s a famous sex study by Dr. Alexa Albert about condom use of commercial sex workers, which kind of makes a different point, however, I do advice against this practice.

Which PE condoms shouldn’t you use?

This is just my personal opinion, but I do not recommend the Trojan Extended Pleasure Condoms because the chemical that is used to numb the penis can also numb the vagina of your sex partner (causing her to feel less excited), because the chemical is not just on the inside of the condom, but everywhere.

What’s the best PE condom?

 Among the best delay condoms are Durex Performax Condoms, which are made from natural rubber latex and are electronically tested.

What’s a better than climax control condoms to last longer?

One issue I have with delay condoms is that they simply don’t help to fix the underlying problem. You still will cum too soon when you don’t use something to numb your penis. It’s way better to train yourself to last longer naturally, so that you don’t need to use some kind of chemical. You can find out more about how to train yourself to last longer in Sexual Stamina Secrets (and yes, it’s free).

Durex Performax is a climax control condom for men who struggle with premature ejaculation (PE).

Keep in mind that this is just my personal opinion, and in general I do not recommend using delay condoms as a way of treating PE.

The chemical that is used to cause the numbing effect is 5% benzocaine.

Positive:

• the benzocaine is only on the inside of the condom
• has a reservoir at the end for extra safety
• 100% electronically tested
• low price
• the numbing lubricant is odorless

Negative:

• sometimes causes a stinging sensation

Overall verdict: 8/10

If you want to use a delay condom, Durex Performax is probably your best choice.

Trojan Extended Pleasure is a climax control condom for men who struggle with premature ejaculation (PE). Since this is one of the most popular condom brands in the USA, I thought I should put up a review here.

Keep in mind that this is just my personal opinion, and in general I do not recommend using delay condoms as a way of treating PE.

The chemical that is used to cause the numbing effect is 4% benzocaine.

Positive:

• has a reservoir at the end for extra safety
• 100% electronically tested
• low price
• the numbing lubricant is odorless

Negative:

• the numbing lubricant is applied to all of the condom, both the inside and the outside. So this condom doesn’t just reduce your sensations, but also the sensations of your sex partner
• sometimes causes a stinging sensation

Overall verdict: 4/10

I do not recommend using Trojan Extended Pleasure. The main issue is that the numbing chemical affects not just your penis, but also her vagina, so she will feel less excited by the sex. Unless your girlfriend always climaxes too soon, you probably don’t want that to happen. Trojan should really improve this issue by applying the numbing agent only on the interior of the condom (other condom manufacturers do the same).

Spermatorrehea means excessive and/or accidental ejaculation or “accidental release”, oftentimes without actually having an orgasm (so the man ejaculations, but doesn’t experience the intense positive feelings of an orgasm). It could be classified as a neurological disorder (aka nervous disorder or neurological disease). It’s not the same as premature ejaculation, but it’s closely related.

Did you masturbate a lot?

Spermatorrhea is most common in men who have masturbated excessively and suffered (or still suffer) from masturbation addiction.

Do you feel uncomfortable in social situations?

Many men who suffer from spermatorrhea prefer to avoid social situations where they mingle with people. They tend to struggle with feelings of inadequacy and often believe that other’s might notice their problem. As you can see, there is a strong psychological component to spermatorrhea.

Enjoy Sex Less?

Another common symptom is that men enjoy actual sex less (intercourse, not masturbation). They might be addicted to masturbation, but they gain less pleasure from their sexual activities than a healthy man would.

Overindulgence in Sexual Fantasies?

Oftentimes men with spermatorrhea have or still are overindulging in sexual fantasies. This might seem paradoxical at first when you consider that they enjoy sex less, but it actually is plausible when you think of it. They try to compensate the reduced amount of pleasure they gain from perception by overindulging in sexual imagination.

Lack of energy?

Among the symptoms of spermatorrhea is also fatigue, tiredness, exhaustion, a lack of energy. You can sometimes even see this because the eyes have a kind of “dull expression”.

Treatments for Spermatorrhea

In Ayurvedic medicine the most common potions used to treat spermatorrhea are:

• Bala
• Confido
• Ashwaganda

There are many spermatorrhea treatments, and I do suggest you read the Sexual Stamina Secrets.

Lotus seeds have been used as an herb for premature ejaculation for hundreds of years in Asian cultures already. In China they are called Lian Zi (蓮子).

In traditional Chinese medicine (TCM) lotus seeds are used for many different purposes, but mainly to strengthen the digestive system, strengthen the reproductive system and to strengthen the heart. Particularly for treating premature ejaculation and spermatorrhea.

How To Consume Lotus Seeds?

There are different ways you can go about it. If you live in a country where you can buy fresh lotus seeds, you can eat them just like that, fresh. In many southeast Asian countries it’s quite a common ingredient.

You can also eat them roasted or dried, and just kind of sprinkle them over any food that you would like to eat them with (like cereals).

However, as a treatment for premature ejaculation the most practical way is to consume them powdered or crushed, and boiled in water as a decoction. 6-15 grams of powder should be added to boiling water and then drink it per day.

Other Benefits

Lotus seeds also contain a lot of thiamine, phosphorus, potassium and manganese. Manganese is an essential trace nutrient for the human body. Phosphoric acid is used in homeopathy to treat PE.

Apart of that, lotus seeds are also powerful antioxidants and have antiviral functions, plus they can be used to lower hypertension (which is sometimes related to PE).

Contraindications

Now there are a couple of situations where it is not advisable to consume lotus seeds or lotus seed concoctions.

If you are constipated or have a bloated abdomen. I am not aware of the effects of eating lotus seeds when pregnant or breastfeeding, so I would stir away from that.

Traditional Chinese medicine (TCM) is a fundamentally different approach to health and healing than the one we have in modern medicine. And while modern medicine is superior in many ways to these ancient forms of medicine, TCM seems to be superior in treating some kinds of ailments, including premature ejaculation (PE).

However, this doesn’t mean you should run to the next acupuncture clinic and have them stick needles into your penis. It’s simply another perspective of looking at PE.

Terminology

It is important to understand that many terms in TCM have different meanings than the same words have in our western understanding. Micah Arsham has written an essay about how the lack of conceptual understanding for the terminology of TCM can cause serious misunderstandings, not just in popular culture but even when prescribing a medical treatment.

Just as an example, when TCM is referring to kidney they do not mean the anatomical organ that we think of when we use the word kidney. If you want an example of this, just check out the what kidney means in traditional Chinese medicine.

For more information on treating premature ejaculation with traditional Chinese medicine claim your complimentary copy of Sexual Stamina Secrets.

In order to really satisfy a woman, you need to have some sexual stamina. It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon. And men tend to come quicker than women. Partly there are biological reasons for it – after all, sex was originally meant to reproduce. And our chances of reproduction are a lot higher if we ejaculate after three minutes of intercourse than if we ejaculate after 30 minutes of intercourse, right? But since you probably don’t just want to have sex to reproduce, here are some tricks to last longer in bed.

Not The Start-Stop-Method

Look, we all know that the start-stop-method can work. If you interrupt intercourse often enough and long enough, then yeah, you can keep your excitement at a level where you will last longer.

But how much fun is that kind of sex?

Not much – neither for you, nor for her.

So let’s look at the stuff that is actually helpful.

7 Second Breathing

This is a simple breathing technique that you can do while you have intercourse. Always make sure that you’re practicing diaphragmatic breathing when you’re having sex (that means: breath with your belly, not with your chest). Here’s a video that shows you how to do diaphragmatic breathing, but this is just a prerequisite for the technique that will follow:

Here are the steps how to do this breathing technique to last longer:

1. You breathe in through your nose, and the breathing in takes 7 seconds.
2. Then you hold your breath in for 7 seconds.
3. And then exhale through your mouth for 7 seconds.

And you just keep on breathing like this during intercourse.

Note: if 7 seconds is too long for you, then you can do 7, or 5 or 4 seconds – just make sure that the time you use to inhale, the time that you hold the breath in and the time that you use to exhale are equal.

Let Her Ride You

The position that is most likely to accelerate your ejaculation is the missionary position (when you are on top). If you let her be on top and ride you – while you lay with your back down, looking up at her as relaxed as possible, you’re stacking the cards in your favor.

There are many simple tricks to last longer in bed, and combining them together will yield the biggest effect – it’s a simple law of addition in that regard.

Mind Control Sex

When you have sex and you want to last longer, you need to control your mind. Too many men start to ride away on a wave of excitement, and they create all these fantasies in their mind and focus on cumming, that they simply get carried away. Instead, you want to have an almost strategic mindset when you’re having sex.

What you think actually can activate the part of your nervous system that is in charge of triggering an orgasm. Now I do not recommend that you think unsexy thoughts while you’re having intercourse. But don’t watch a hot porn movie in the “cinema of your mind” either. Be aware of the experience, without getting carried away with excitement.

You can find more tricks to last longer in bed in Sexual Stamina Secrets.

Most men who suffer from premature ejaculation (PE) also have another problem, which is related: not enough serotonin. (This could be either because they don’t produce enough serotonin. Or they do produce enough serotonin, but they don’t have enough serotonin receptors, or their serotonin receptors aren’t working as well as they should. Or the serotonin breaks down too quickly.)

Serotonin is a molecule, a neurotransmitter, a chemical that your body produces, and that affects how you think and feel.

Serotonin helps you to delay ejaculation, control your impulses and also: to last longer in bed.

Get Some Sunlight

I could probably make a lot of money telling you to buy some new serotonin supplement. But instead I’m going to tell you how to increase your serotonin production naturally, easily and completely free of charge:

Go out and get some sunlight.

We have become overly obsessed with protecting us from UV rays, because of skin cancer and because it can make the skin age faster and look wrinkly.

But UV light is actually important and a necessary ingredient for good health. When you go out in the sun and you get your dose of natural UV light, then your body will produce vitamin D.

Now guess what you need vitamin D for?

Yep, that’s right: serotonin production.

So what happens if you sit in front of a screen indoors all day and don’t get enough sunlight? Your body doesn’t produce enough vitamin D. And when your body doesn’t produce enough vitamin D, then it doesn’t produce enough serotonin. (Btw. your body needs to create vitamin D by itself – supplements don’t work because even if you take vitamin D supplements, the vitamin D doesn’t makes it into your body in a way that is beneficial to you).

Less Stress

Now while short-term stress can actually be good for your brain, chronic stress usually wreaks havoc on your system and reduces your serotonin levels.

Learning to manage your stress is an important skill so that you’re able to remain healthy and have a balanced life.

Get A Massage

Getting a massage can also increase serotonin production naturally. Studies have shown that massages (or any kind of caring body contact) boosts serotonin levels (if you don’t believe me, be free to read the academic papers).

Apart of that, there are plenty of great massage methods out there, so if you like the usual Swedish oil massage, that’s great. But you can also try something more intense like sports massage or Thai massage or Shiatsu, or Indian head massage, neuromuscular massage, hot stone massage, and on and on.

Eat Fermented Foods

Fermented foods can help you to digest nutrients better, because of the beneficial microflora which they contain. It basically helps your body to assimilate nutrients more effectively, and your body needs these nutrients to produce serotonin.

Sleep Well

Many people nowadays think of sleep as a necessity and nuisance, and kind of try to get along with as little sleep as possible so that they have more time to get things done in the 24 hours that make a day.

But when you sleep your body does many things which are important for maintaining your health and helping you to perform optimally – and one of the things that happen during your sleep is that your body produces serotonin.

Work Out

Now everybody is telling you that physical exercise is good for this and that, and you’ve heard it a thousand times. So if you are already exercising, then you’ll probably be happy to hear that this helps to increase serotonin production naturally.

And if you are not yet exercising then this information won’t probably make you start doing it either. (I’m being realistic here).

But if you really want to beat PE then you should know that regular physical exercise can be very beneficial to you.

Remember Happy Events

Believe it or not, but when you remember a happy, uplifting experience you actually increase the serotonin production in your anterior cingulate cortex. That’s a part of your brain which is involved in controlling attention.

So simply answer these questions:

• When was the last time that you felt really, really happy?
• What made you feel great when you were a child?
• When did you have a lot of fun with good friends?

Now when you answer this question, don’t just say: “I felt really, really happy last year when I went on that vacation to the Maledives.”

No, really remember that vacation. Think about what made you feel so happy there specifically. How did you feel there? Remember the beautiful turquoise waters, the delicious food, the smiling faces of the people around you…

Nobody wants to be a minute man. That’s why learning how to last longer in bed for men can be one of the most important things to improve your sex life.

There are different approaches to delay your ejaculation: short term and long term.

That means some techniques or tricks can help you to last a little longer while you’re having sex. These are short-term fixes, they can easily be applied and will buy you some extra time.

On the other hand, you have long-term methods which basically train you to last longer in general. The downside of them is of course that you need to train and practice for a while before you see results – the upside on the other hand is that it’s the one and only way to really get to the top of your love-making potential and enjoy long-lasting, intense, passionate, hot sex.

But we’re going to look at some quick fixes first:

Slow Down

Now slowing down is just one of the things you can do to keep your sexual arousal in check. Now the point is not to enjoy sex less – the point is to enjoy sex more. But if you ejaculate too fast, you won’t enjoy it as much. So the point of slowing down is that you want to spread the intensity out, and intensify it later on.

Sometimes your sex partner might want you to go faster and harder (and you might want to give in to that request because you feel like that too). But keep a steady slow pace so you can last longer in bed.

Mental Techniques

There are mental techniques for those who want to know how to last longer in bed. And while it’s easy to kind of push them aside and think that they don’t matter, I consider them to be some of the most important things you can do to beat premature ejaculation.

One thing you want to do is to practice to be in a relaxed state of mind when you have sex.

Wait a second, did I just say relaxed state of mind? While having sex?

Yep. Now that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t enjoy sex or shouldn’t get excited about it. It simply means that you slowly work your way up to the final excitement. But you want to get into an almost dream-like state of mind when you’re having sex – you know, that feeling like when you’re somewhere between wakefulness and sleep. Because that’s when you’re whole system is still in parasympathetic mode (this is where your parasympathetic nervous system is in charge, and you have a strong erection without being near an orgasm yet).

Focus On Her

If you focus all of your attention on your sex partner, then you will actually last longer – and she will enjoy sex more. So pay attention to her breathing, the sounds that she makes, her muscles tensing up and relaxing in different parts of her body and all of these things.

There’s plenty information out there for those looking for ways how to last longer in bed for men, but I’m not sure if you’ve ever heard of the next one I’m going to talk about.

Watch Porn Without Masturbating

Many men who suffer from premature ejaculation have watched a lot of porn. The problem with porn is: it really gets into your head. It’s designed that way. It pushes all your hot buttons and gets you to maximum horniness in minimum time.

Now one thing you can do to train your mind to last longer in bed is to watch a porn movie, the one that usually excites you the most, but don’t masturbate. In fact, try to remain as calm and relaxed as possible while watching the porn movie. This can be a way to train your mind to not get carried away.

There is no one simple formula that teaches men how to last longer in bed. It’s a multifaceted approach and you’ll have to do several things in order to really get the best results. For a more systematic, step-by-step approach check out Sexual Stamina Secrets.